I guess I’m changing the name of the blog from BSing through MS to, what the actual fuck, you can have lupus and MS?!?
So, I’ve been diagnosed with lupus.
The referral to see the specialist to get treatment was sent and I got the first available appointment. For February 19th 2020.
Ive known for a bit now and it’s partially why I didn’t continue the blog because… Honestly it makes me feel like a whiny bitch to talk about my health, even though I know I’m not whining about it.
I still haven’t really felt like doing much research on Lupus. Other than what I had learned from watching House MD years ago, I’m pretty clueless.
There isn’t an update on the MS treatments yet either. I had to cancel my doctor’s appointment for the pre-screening because I was just too tired to get up.
And lately I’ve been having anxietyless anxiety attacks? It just suddenly feels like I’m disassociating, and it’s probably the most terrifying feeling I’ve felt so far.
I don’t know if my anxiety is getting worse because of the stress or if it is even anxiety. I’ve read a lot of MS patients have felt similar sensations.
None the less. I’m lost. I feel so broken and useless. I’m doing my best to stay positive but damn.
On the bright side, I have been keeping up with my makeup and such. I have been doing the self care I promised myself I’d do, and I’ve gained back about 10 lbs so far.
I also got a Wacom drawing tablet so I can hopefully get back into art without having to worry about the cost of paints… Because… Digital.
Now I just have to learn how to use it…
More to come soon.